I consider myself a "convert" to the church because I was baptized at age 11 instead of age eight. However, I was blessed as a baby in sacrament meeting and went to church with my grandparents at least 200 times between the ages of 4 and 11.
I didn't have an active LDS mother or father. Because of that, I missed out on Family Home Evening, scripture study, keeping the Sabbath day holy, honoring all of the commandments and seeing a good example at home. I certainly never felt the Spirit at home in the contentious environment my parents provided.
But things were different at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. There was a calming effect as soon as I walked in the door. There was an air of love and kindness, charity and hope: intangible—however recognizable—feelings.
Before I had the Gift of the Holy Ghost, I may have on occasion felt "the voice of God in music" or acted "beyond [my] ability" (quoted from a talk given by Truman G. Madsen). But those were rare occasions when the Holy Ghost was clearly testifying to me of God’s divinity, as opposed to acting as a constant guide or companion.
I know that non-members and even non-Christians can feel the Spirit testify to them. That is His job. But members who have the gift of the Holy Ghost can have Him constantly with them as a comforter, companion, guide and friend. There is a big difference between being testified to and having a constant companion. It’s much like the difference between a couple that is engaged and a couple that is married. A single person might say there isn’t much difference besides the piece of paper you get from a judge. A married person knows there is a discernable difference. You really have to experience it to know for yourself. And I have had plenty of experience with the Holy Ghost—both as a member and as a non-member.
When a baptized member (like myself, for example) does something to drive the Spirit away, they experience a noticeable difference. When I've made bad decisions in the past, I could literally feel the Spirit leave my presence. I could feel Heavenly Father’s disapproval and no matter how much I tried to physically “manufacture” that feeling I get when the Spirit is present—it wouldn’t come.
I am sure doubters and non-believers would roll their eyes if I told them that I can feel Heavenly Father’s approval when I study the scriptures or do service for others. But the truth of the matter is I have done as Alma taught. I have experimented on his words (Alma 32:27). I was inactive for a while when I was a teenager (hard not to be with inactive parents). When I was inactive I’d try to test God and see if I could make myself feel the Spirit even when I wasn’t doing anything “good”. It wouldn’t come.
I’m sure some would say it’s all in my subconscious and there’s no way to prove what I’m saying. But I’ve proven it. I was a non-member, then a baptized but unconverted member. Now I’m an active, converted believer and I have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost—every day, through every decision. I can’t “make myself” feel it. I feel it when I am doing God’s will and when I am being testified to. And as they say, it is a still small voice. And you can’t hear it unless you want to.
I didn't have an active LDS mother or father. Because of that, I missed out on Family Home Evening, scripture study, keeping the Sabbath day holy, honoring all of the commandments and seeing a good example at home. I certainly never felt the Spirit at home in the contentious environment my parents provided.
But things were different at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. There was a calming effect as soon as I walked in the door. There was an air of love and kindness, charity and hope: intangible—however recognizable—feelings.
Before I had the Gift of the Holy Ghost, I may have on occasion felt "the voice of God in music" or acted "beyond [my] ability" (quoted from a talk given by Truman G. Madsen). But those were rare occasions when the Holy Ghost was clearly testifying to me of God’s divinity, as opposed to acting as a constant guide or companion.
I know that non-members and even non-Christians can feel the Spirit testify to them. That is His job. But members who have the gift of the Holy Ghost can have Him constantly with them as a comforter, companion, guide and friend. There is a big difference between being testified to and having a constant companion. It’s much like the difference between a couple that is engaged and a couple that is married. A single person might say there isn’t much difference besides the piece of paper you get from a judge. A married person knows there is a discernable difference. You really have to experience it to know for yourself. And I have had plenty of experience with the Holy Ghost—both as a member and as a non-member.
When a baptized member (like myself, for example) does something to drive the Spirit away, they experience a noticeable difference. When I've made bad decisions in the past, I could literally feel the Spirit leave my presence. I could feel Heavenly Father’s disapproval and no matter how much I tried to physically “manufacture” that feeling I get when the Spirit is present—it wouldn’t come.
I am sure doubters and non-believers would roll their eyes if I told them that I can feel Heavenly Father’s approval when I study the scriptures or do service for others. But the truth of the matter is I have done as Alma taught. I have experimented on his words (Alma 32:27). I was inactive for a while when I was a teenager (hard not to be with inactive parents). When I was inactive I’d try to test God and see if I could make myself feel the Spirit even when I wasn’t doing anything “good”. It wouldn’t come.
I’m sure some would say it’s all in my subconscious and there’s no way to prove what I’m saying. But I’ve proven it. I was a non-member, then a baptized but unconverted member. Now I’m an active, converted believer and I have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost—every day, through every decision. I can’t “make myself” feel it. I feel it when I am doing God’s will and when I am being testified to. And as they say, it is a still small voice. And you can’t hear it unless you want to.
Comments