I don't know if you are like me, but when I want to prove myself to the Lord, I sometimes put my own faith to the test. Sort of like asking for a promotion--with it comes more responsibility, which I want so that I can be closer to Him.
So about three months ago, the doctor asked me if I would like to get the Down Syndrome test. I wasn't sure if my insurance covered it so I told her I would check with them (make sure it isn't a $1000 test) and get back to her. I called the insurance and they cover most of the cost of the test, though we'd have to pay a small portion of the fee.
I wasn't too concerned about the money, after all it wasn't very much. However, I remembered back to a blessing my wonderful priesthood honoring husband gave me when we found out I was pregnant promising me that the baby will be healthy and my pregnancy will be safe.
I have a testimony that blessings given by worthy members of the priesthood are words of God and cannot be wrong. So I decided to test my faith and testimony by declining the Down Syndrome test. After all, the Lord promised me the baby and my pregnancy will be safe and healthy, right?
I didn't think about it again. My doctor hounded me like 10 times, "You should really get the test just in case" but I dismissed her and let her know that I have complete faith that everything will be fine. I think she rolled her eyes but whatev.
About two weeks ago I met with the doctor to go over the ultrasound I had in October. She said she was concerned because the baby has Renal Pelvic Dilation. This means one of his kidneys is larger than the other and has potential blockage. I was worried for about two hours until I remembered the words from the blessing I received. I decided to put it out of my mind and not worry.
Today the doctor called to let me know that they want me to do another ultra sound in about a month to see if the condition has worsened or gotten better. I decided to do a little research on the topic. Of course I found out that Renal Pelvic Dilation--or Pyelectasis as it's called scientifically--can be linked to Down Syndrome.
So I took a deep breath and realized more than ever that the Lord knows what I'm up to. I didn't TELL him I was going to test my faith by skipping the Down Syndrome test. He just knows me and He knows the desires of my heart. So He's testing me a little more. Throwing that Down Syndrome possibility in there to see if I will denounce my "faith test" and run to the doctor to get the Down Syndrome test and start freaking out thinking my child will be born with special needs.
Well, I had a blessing telling me that Tyler will be healthy. I need not worry. I am confident that we will have another ultrasound and the doctor will announce that the Pyelectasis is gone and all is well. It would be easy and probably normal for me to go and get that Down Syndrome test now-- and I would if I hadn't promised in my heart that I knew the Lord is in charge and that I don't even need the test. So I basically am testing myself and the Lord is adding some challenge to see what I will do.
I refuse to back down or give up or question my testimony. And I know I will come out of this stronger and happier and more faithful. And if something does go wrong, I know in the end Tyler will be healthy and we will have a wonderful life together learning, loving and living. The Lord is in charge. I know this and I won't forget it, even in my moments of worry.
So about three months ago, the doctor asked me if I would like to get the Down Syndrome test. I wasn't sure if my insurance covered it so I told her I would check with them (make sure it isn't a $1000 test) and get back to her. I called the insurance and they cover most of the cost of the test, though we'd have to pay a small portion of the fee.
I wasn't too concerned about the money, after all it wasn't very much. However, I remembered back to a blessing my wonderful priesthood honoring husband gave me when we found out I was pregnant promising me that the baby will be healthy and my pregnancy will be safe.
I have a testimony that blessings given by worthy members of the priesthood are words of God and cannot be wrong. So I decided to test my faith and testimony by declining the Down Syndrome test. After all, the Lord promised me the baby and my pregnancy will be safe and healthy, right?
I didn't think about it again. My doctor hounded me like 10 times, "You should really get the test just in case" but I dismissed her and let her know that I have complete faith that everything will be fine. I think she rolled her eyes but whatev.
About two weeks ago I met with the doctor to go over the ultrasound I had in October. She said she was concerned because the baby has Renal Pelvic Dilation. This means one of his kidneys is larger than the other and has potential blockage. I was worried for about two hours until I remembered the words from the blessing I received. I decided to put it out of my mind and not worry.
Today the doctor called to let me know that they want me to do another ultra sound in about a month to see if the condition has worsened or gotten better. I decided to do a little research on the topic. Of course I found out that Renal Pelvic Dilation--or Pyelectasis as it's called scientifically--can be linked to Down Syndrome.
So I took a deep breath and realized more than ever that the Lord knows what I'm up to. I didn't TELL him I was going to test my faith by skipping the Down Syndrome test. He just knows me and He knows the desires of my heart. So He's testing me a little more. Throwing that Down Syndrome possibility in there to see if I will denounce my "faith test" and run to the doctor to get the Down Syndrome test and start freaking out thinking my child will be born with special needs.
Well, I had a blessing telling me that Tyler will be healthy. I need not worry. I am confident that we will have another ultrasound and the doctor will announce that the Pyelectasis is gone and all is well. It would be easy and probably normal for me to go and get that Down Syndrome test now-- and I would if I hadn't promised in my heart that I knew the Lord is in charge and that I don't even need the test. So I basically am testing myself and the Lord is adding some challenge to see what I will do.
I refuse to back down or give up or question my testimony. And I know I will come out of this stronger and happier and more faithful. And if something does go wrong, I know in the end Tyler will be healthy and we will have a wonderful life together learning, loving and living. The Lord is in charge. I know this and I won't forget it, even in my moments of worry.
Comments
and ps. you TOTALLY don't look fat. i PROMISE if i didnt know better i'd say you dont look pregnant in that picture, even. cause i can't see your stomache.
pps i can't wait till tomorrow!